I’ve said it before: It’s OK to say no to any new project, assignment, or role you’re offered. I’ll always encourage you to be ruthless—but diplomatic—when negotiating what you work on, so you can gravitate toward doing more of the work that energizes you, plays to your strengths, and makes your value seen and understood.
But let’s say you’re offered a new project, assignment, or role that’s neither something you’d hate, nor your dream gig. What then?
Here’s a brilliant yet oh-so-simple simple tactic that I picked up from Kayla Paulson, a consultant who helps non-profits lead change and engage their volunteers. Kayla says:
Master the art of the “Yes, if…”
So next time you’re presented with a less-than-perfect offer, you could counter with:
Yes, if… I can start after my kids go back to school.
Yes, if… I can get help with this other pressing priority.
Yes, if… if I can be the one to present our findings to senior leadership.
Last month I asked 1,400 participants in my Emerging Leaders Webinar Series: Have you ever said “Yes, if…” to an opportunity that was offered to you? As it turns out, many of them had! Here are some favorite examples:
Yes, if you are OK with me dropping other projects. — Yanmin
Yes, if I could be the one that gets credit. — Emily
Yes, if we can use the lessons to improve the way we do other things. — Sneha
Yes, if when this project is done, I could work on XYZ (a passion project). — Laura
Yes, if it can wait until after my vacation. — Molly
Yes, if you can help me prioritize things on my plate. — Neha
Yes, if I can get the resources I need to be successful. — Rhonda
Yes, if I can drop my current position and focus on the new role. — Samantha
Your turn! Have you ever countered an offer or a request with your own Yes If? Where did negotiations go from there?
For more ideas like this, get my book Woman of Influence: 9 Steps to Build Your Brand, Establish Your Legacy, and Thrive (McGraw-Hill, 2019). Download a free chapter here.
